What Is The Rabbit Hole?

I don't really know where I got this idea, but it sure seems to work for me. The rabbit hole is, of course, from Alice In Wonderland, where everything is not as it appears. This is the crazy world of BPD, or Borderline Personality Disorder.
Just defining BPD is like entering into a totally confusing realm of contradictions and paradoxes. Sometimes yes is yes, but sometimes it is no and other times it is "help me", yet other times it is masked behind fear and anxiety.
Personally, I have none of the symptoms of this disorder, but I have learned to recognize them well. I have lived with one or more family members who suffers from this disorder for many years.
It has taught me much more than I ever wanted to know. I don't like psychology, I don't like studying human behavior. I like music, art, nature, inventing things, language, travel, making things with my hands, beauty, dance, and making things more efficient. I like things like solar power, wood stoves, acoustic guitars, hiking in Vermont and playing music with friends. I like single malt Scotch and good ales.
The chaos and dysfunction of BPD is as alien to me as a suit and tie. I just don't like it. Yet I am subjected to it every single day of my life.
I know God has taught me many, many lessons I never would have learned otherwise, but I want to graduate from this class now. In many ways it is like having a child with Down Syndrome, you are always on call and can never quite rest; at least that is what I imagine.
It takes a lot of persistence and humility to keep from becoming affected by the family member who is suffering. My rambunctiousness has been tamed, involuntarily. I have been humiliated so many times by the things they have said and done that I don't even try to remember anymore.
I think my faith in God and my music and friends have preserved me.